Forgive – Control the Controlled

It’s time to start FRESH

Life is too short to dwell on the past.  Every day you are given the opportunity to start fresh and create CHANGE!  Far to often we allow news, people, comments, and other things dictate how we feel.  I know that I need to improve how I react, let things effect, and take over my emotions.  I don’t want to let life run me…I want to run my life.  What about you?


No matter who you are you will always have good times and bad times.  There will always be highs and lows.  You will always lose loved ones and gain loved ones.  However, how you let life effect you is completely in YOUR CONTROL.  YOU CAN CONTROL the CONTROLLED!   If we stay to high on the highs we will come crashing down.  If we dwell on the lows of lows we will be sucked into depression.  It’s all about the ability to control the controlled.  YES, you can CONTROL YOU! You can control who you let in your life, how you handle a situation, and whether or not you forgive, forget or hold a grudge.  YUP YOUR CHOICE!   If there is one thing that you can control it is YOU!  Nothing else in this world will you ever have complete control over (sorry – NOTHING)!



Did you know that every hand you are dealt in life is given to you to teach you something.  You have the choice of how you want to process it? You can be upset, mad, unforgiving, hold grudges, dwell on it, be hurt, etc.  OR you can process it, think about it, and figure out a solution or how you will deal with the situation.  YUP!  Your Choice!


2016 was one of the most difficult years for me.  We had never had an immediate family member’s life taken before through an unexpected illnesses or an accident.  But on March 15, 2016 the good Lord decided he needed my brother Tony more than we did! If you have never lost a sibling or parent this may be difficult to know that feeling.  But those of you that have lost a family member earlier than expected you may be able to relate.

Those three little words CHANGED our lives FOREVER.  You have CANCER (I was there when the doctor gave my brother that news)!  In that instant everything changed.  He really didn’t know what to do.  I realized I was mortal and all you can do is cry.  If you have heard these words before you know that feeling.  If you were an outsider looking in it’s easy to say WOW, that sucks.  You can pray for them, send them good vibes, bring them meals, and other things but you really don’t experience what they are experiencing.  As the patient or a family member there is nothing more that you want than to have a cure or be healed.


This was a HUGE turning point in my life (I have had others but this one was eye opening).  I realized I was mortal too!  I realized how precious life truly is (at any time things can change forever and you can never have back that moment).  I realized family is extremely important (Yes, I have always believe this but you take so much for granted ALWAYS).  YOU think about photos you have take and who may be missing at the next family gathering or event.   I don’t know why up until this point I went through life believing NOTHING HORRIBLE would ever happen.  Especially in those years of 16 – 21, you think you are invisible.  I know I did many ridiculous and down right STUPID things.  Things that now looking back I am grateful to still be alive.

Now in my 40’s I view things differently.  I realize if you don’t have your HEALTH, you have NOTHING!    My brother was diagnosed with stage four liver cancer in 2014 and was only given 12 weeks to live.  12 WEEKS TO LIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  He did everything in his power to combat the enemy but two years later the enemy took him.  Why do I share this with you?  Because I want you to start implementing three life altering tasks into your life.

Three tasks to help you become more positive

1.  Believe you are capable of ANYTHING, then work for it!

2.  Give yourself daily affirmations. When you tell yourself things you actually begin to believe it!

3.  Before you get out of bed in the morning tell yourself at least three things that you are grateful for each day!


When I returned home after my brother’s funeral I began implementing these three tasks daily.  These three tasks helped me get through a horrible year of multiple firsts.  I truly believe they can help get you through anything you have going on too!

Have you lost a loved one?  Do you struggle with negative self talk?

Tags: , , , , , ,


No comments yet.

Leave a Reply